我怎么了？？好委屈。。

在别人眼里我总是表现坚强，然而一次又一次的打击狠狠地把我墼垮。以前的我就对自己许下承诺不可以再轻易流眼泪，可是两行大大的泪珠便从眼眶留了下来。。很无奈，委屈。。可是又如何呢？？也只能往肚子里吞让它胀得鼓鼓。。。 我一定要坚强面对每一刻的变化， 只要管好自己才能兼顾好别人的事情。 其实有些事情说就真的很容易， 当你真正体会是那才是考验你的时候。那不只是反映着那些在你脑海浮起的画面， 也许可以造成对你的重大伤害。

发现最近的我越来越累了，被低落的情绪困惑着， 醒着的自己犹如空旷的空壳，在繁忙的人海中穿梭，寻找一个属于自己的平衡点。只有睡着的自己仿佛可以与世隔绝， 享受无烦恼无威逼的空间。。。。。。。

很多很多事情发生了就是铁定的事实，谁也不能改变，逝去的光阴也不可重来， 一眛的逃避现实，只让事情变恶化。。 但是现在的我啊只想逃得远远的。。越。。。远。。越。。好。。。。。

放弃

当你决定放弃某些人，事或物时，也许你认为那已不值得你留恋。 然而，你曾经想过这是你真正的决定吗？？ 最近脑海经常闪起这句话，“如果心还有不甘的话，就代表你还没有彻底的放弃。” 要放弃就要没有任何遗憾。若心有不甘的话，那只会变成心中的一根刺，扎在心中某一个地方，狠狠的刺痛着。唯有将那根刺拔起，深深地埋藏在心的角落 ，得到真正的解脱。每一人，事，物都是独一无二， 失去的东西，从来都不曾属于你的， 唯有珍惜当下才能拥有它。

以前的我总觉得每事都是理所当然，不懂的珍惜感恩。 现在的我也学会体谅别人，怀着一股感恩的心生活着。放弃是痛苦的，而时间则是治愈伤口的良药。人总要往前看，一味的往后看只会在原地踏步。

Past time......

A new batch of tarcians are having their top up programme in UK. Times passes so fast and it has been 1 year time i been to UK. Recently, i can look at those familiar photos which i had been taken one year ago uploaded in facebook by all those juniors and make me feel so envy for that.

 I really miss the moment at UK with no pressure from work, family as well as myself. I recall all my memories by viewing the photos taken at the my lovely city in UK---SHEFFIELD. However, by viewing the photos, i recall how MISERABLE is my life in UK and regret that why i din enjoy my UK life till the max. Everyone owes to have a good and beautiful memories in UK but for me there are some unfortunately incidents happened and it really affect my mood during my UK time. So i just tried hard to recover myself and suit myself into the peaceful and lovely life. I do MISS uk life and planning to pay a visit over there again. 

No matter how, all of them had been be the past tense and life is still going on. Great Life is depended on how you manage it. Fight toward the desired aims and dreams!!

                                    Group photo before boarding to UK
                                                       *Excited*

                                   Reach Manchester with mountain of luggages!!!

                                               Outlook  of Sheffield Hallam University
                                   

Eye of Sheffield

                                      Having lovely BBQ at Michelle's house...
                                               

                                                    Trip to Whitby

                                            Enjoying our KEBAB
                           (it is must eat food in sheffield especially during midnight time)

Experience Berry Picking in UK!!

                                    Nice night view from Bistrol...

                                                 Hiking

                                    My lovely bed which accompany me three months and

                                    sharing happiness and sad with me all the while.
                                                           *I MISS IT*

WHAT WOULD U DO IF YOU EVER HAVE A CHANCE?

What is the first thing you wish to do if the god give you the one more chance to make decision in your life?? Life is full of challenges and plenty of decisions had been made. *Tired* The first thing i wish to do is change my mind of doing something i really interested to do. I really did  made a mistake which change my life deeply.

No matter what decision i made, i have made it with the deep consideration.  However, life is full of predictions and you would not know what will be happening in the coming day. Everyday just a new chance for us to catch up, chances is everywhere and it's on your decision to catch it tightly. Thus, chances please coming to me and i will catch it tightly.

Recently become the middle man and it's such a suck thing which have to tolerate for both. It's so so hard to get tolerance between two persons and yet it has make me become breathable and yet nothing can be get done if the thing is continuously  happened. I have to make my mind clear and not to influenced by others. I have my own determination to decide!!! 

SEARCHING

Quite a long time did not update my blog. It's so relaxing to have one week holiday continuously and time to get back to work. Yet, the feeling of mine now is not curious of what is going on just feel like want to escape from work. If someone really interest in his job, he will put more effort to get it done.  Is it the life now is not my wanted life? Or am i lack of motivation to carry on my work?? I keep on searching and searching the aim that will enhance the life one that i wish to be. However, i have a new target to achieve right now and from now on i will be working hard towards to it. Two more hours, i will be leaving and start for my journey toward my new target So, wish me luck!!!

LOVELY GATHERING

Today, I had a little and yet meaningful gathering in BRJ, Wangsa Maju which we have not been there for almost one year time. We have lot of topic which we can't stop discussing. It's a wonderful time when we get together. We just like back to college time and  have non stop topic discussing. Times flies and we still got many to talk about but we left as time is getting late. All of time need to get back and ready for work tomorrow. I do appreciate every moment with you guys. Miss you guys..Wish all of us have a bright future. We do support each other no matter what's is happening.

BREATHLESS LIFE

Recently work more than 12 hours per day for one whole week and this will be carried on continuously. The major activity for whole day just  wake up, work, bath and finally sleep. This kind of lifestyle has been repeating day by day. In addition, u have no direction to do with a work and it make things more difficult. How wish am i just to escape out and relax my mind. Finally i know that the heavy workload really can cure one's loneliness and yet it can make your life more miserable. Everyone has their own responsibility, don't just ignore and push away the  responsibility against to others. Please do your part and did what you suppose to do. I need REST REST REST.

STUDY TIME BEGIN

Today is another late working to me and it will be continuous for few days to rush up my work. However, besides the busy working life, i'm gonna to kick on my study motivation for my exam. I need motivation to reach my passion. Time to arrange a time table and stick with it but how easy to follow the schedule with the big tons of workload which are waiting for me. Everyday have to convince myself to make me more confident on my work and there is a change on me. Recently been to some places which seems to familiar to me before but yet the same decoration, same situation with different feeling. Just try our best and god will look on hard works that you have done.

Morning or night

It is 12.30am in the morning...Yet, i just stepped into my home not more than 1 hour and have to to get up for work after 6 hours. Recently, the workload is keep on increasing and i have to deal with all those within the time specified. I just want to finished all those outstanding work before leaving. It's quite torturing when taking over other's left over as i am experienced that before. I think it's time to make a change, if not dare to step out the first step, you will not able to know the difference that you can be. TIME TO MAKE A CHANGE....

BUSY LIFE AHEAD

Finally i reached kl from my sweet home by using more than 6 hours. What the long journey that usually will use 3 hours to reach. The traffic was so terrible and you can see the red light along the road all the way. While packing up all my stuff and start thinking the busy life is coming ahead . Busy life is tired but i do love this kind of busy to spread my concentration and focus on my work and not to think others. Working is one of the best medicine for me to get rid all emo mood. Once you get into busy life, you will not feel so empty and start to feel the life is more meaningful. It gives you the work satisfition and more importantly you have to understand what is your target and aim to achieve. Hard work gives the better reward and it has no doubt on it. Who else don't like the easy job with the better reward? It will come to you when you believe in it. Set your mindset and move towards to your goals.

                                      Here is the new song -Lazy song by Bruno Mars
                                   * How wish i can lay on my bed for a week time*

TIME FLIES

Finally MAY is coming and there is 3 continuous holidays to celebrate the coming of May. Thinking of packing thing and yet i'm still lazy laying here and do nothing with my blogging. Recently i had though a lot and tired of thinking some which will never happen and start understanding many life principles. They really make me understand life is not only you yourself and yet it is more than what you expected. Thus, please do appreciate your life and explore your life. The stage of mine finally wake up and know that the world not only that. It needs you to find the unique of it. It's time to take nap for this lovely Sat. Guys, enjoy the long weekend. Love Life...

        Before leaving, just to share with you that iphone 4 in white is officially launched. Think of getting one? However, there is still an unknown answer in Malaysia.
                                     http://www.littledoremi.com/apple-white-iphone-4/

PERFECT??

What are the characteristic of a perfect person?? Rich, knowledgeable,a good job, a steady life??  How to identify a prefect person? Everyone around the world wish to be a perfect person and yet everyone is pushing themselves to be a perfect person. In the way of becoming a perfect person, did you realize that you have missed out something that really need your care and attention? Mostly people are doing without caring other's feeling and please do remember there is not only you in this world. Just think on the other's point of view and what consequences will bring to others whatever you did and act. The most importantly is you have done your best and your part in every moment. Be the perfect person at the moment. Goal of the end might be important and yet the process of going through will not be missed out as well. Every matter in this world is just like a life cycle and no matter how it will be coming back to the stage that it suppose to be. So, do take the thing easy...POWER OF LIFE!!!

Share a music video of SHOW LUO ZHI XIANG

Be yourself at the moment

Have you be yourself at the moment? Have you enjoy and appreciate everything happened around you at the moment? Life is approaching to changes and challenges all the way. The most important is how do you overcome all those barries and get towards to your goals. What did you see before reaching your desired destination? Think of the the experiences all the way and do appreciate them but not only focus on the goals at the end. In the end, you will find that you have missed out something meaningful and yet waste your precious time to chase for unrealistic. Just be normal human being and ready for every moments. Life is simple, life is great. <3<3

Memories..

It's Monday again after the super relaxing weekend. Time to work again but i'm not willing to get into my bed so early as i still enjoying lovely weekend and i don't want to miss it. Since nothing to do, i was viewing all my photo albums through my facebook and it did reminding me for so many good memories especially during Europe trip time. In the meanwhile, i really regret that i din enjoy my trip in deep due to my emo mood. However, it is really a good memories for me and been to so many places with all my lovely friends. You guys really make the trip so amazing and give me care whenever necessary. I did remembered the chat time session during night time. Here is to share with you all some of my Europe trip's photo. There are amazing countries with different kind of counture as well as life style. No matter how, do enjoy your life and live happily forever. Great life is waiting for us......

                                                            Holland

                                                          

  
                                                           Belgium

                              Venice- water city as well my lovely and memorable place.

                         Rome-remind me of the huge and amazing buildign structure

                                                Piza slanding tower

                          There are many types of church around europe with the noble design

                                                        Milan- Shopping heaven
                    

                                                             Paris

MAY

        Month of May is coming soon, what are the most important point for the employee to look at the calender? The answer is HOLIDAY and yet there are two public holidays are waiting for us. *Happy* In fact, there is another important task for me to complete which is sitting for exam and i am ready to back to study life for a short while. I need to study on weekend. @@
        I notice another super duper important event in May and can you guess it? Yeah, the second sunday of May is MOTHER'S DAY. Now, i am thinking what to prepare and get for my mother? But i am quite lazy to do shopping for a period of time d..Hmm, a dinner treat is a must and yet what else besides dinner? Short trip vacation? Pressie? Many ideas are appearing in mind.
        Yesterday received a long waited little present which is my favourite Little panda biscuit with strawberry flavor. I like every strawberry cream in the tiny biscuit with the cute panda pic printed on it. And yet i think it will become the snack which accompany me during study period.

                                     My cute cute panda biscuit from Meiji

Relieve...

I just like the weather at night. No noise, windy, cold and it's the best time for me to enjoy my secret time. I feel relief nowt because of nothing. Just have the relief feeling suddenly May be i have found some solution for the problems. When you try not to overweight something, u will find that life will be more easier.. Most importantly, just let your everyday is a happy day.. Must live your life with appreciate heart..Tml will be having another outing night at Pavillion. Tomorrow will be a good good night...Cheer up everybody.

Change with decision

Tired life is getting more and more nearer to me. Which path am i looking for actually? Choices are appearing every second in our life and we need to make all the decisions at the same time...Recently, i am asking myself that what i have done during my 6 months working life..have you think what have u did in one whole day while you are ready going to bed?  Every day just spend few minutes time to flash back what u have done and to be prepared for the better day. Now my indecisive is attacking me nowadays and again i need to make another decision.  As quoted by my friends, stay firm with your decision and do not look back..I did think about you sometimes but yet the memory of you seems far from me. That day i saw 'Him' again and he seems din't change much actually, but i still wish him have happily life ahead. Everyone scare changes and yet if you don't change, you will never improve and know the final result.  Should i change? It's late night again, Good night everybody.

TREAT YOURSELF BETTER

Another late night, i am blogging here while listening music. These are the things which can relax my mind after a whole day tiring work. Nowadays, i just like to reading books and listening music especially during my lovely weekend. Just try to fully utilize my life with a appreciate heart and life is great just because yourself. Don't ever ever live just because others. Previously i just always thinking in negative way and crying while in bad mood. No matter how u treat yourself in such a bad way, the person who hurt you will never feel it and realize it. Someday ago, i'm so naive to be believed in trust and just believing in what people tell me. In fact, things won't be the exactly as what you felt or saw it. I did felt the deep heart pain after some incidents happened on me which just like on the tv show. I just look on it so seriously and did not let go it. Ended up, i am suffering in term of hurting myself and hating myself so much. Yet, finally i learnt it and climb up from the pain and hurt that i had suffer. Sometimes, some scenes will just flashing through my mind and yet it still means the unforgettable memory to me and i appreciate it.

EXPRESS MYSELF

What is the best way to express feeling? Yes, I admit that i'm not used to express my feeling in public. *It will be serious when my feeling burst up* May be due to this, I had a bad and suffer time during UK time. I find no way to release my feeling and ended up i locked up myself and don't let others to get near to me. I still remember that time i feel so fed up and wonder am i having the physchology problem. This consequences stay longer and longer and affect my mind, studies and even my friends whoever cares me and concern me. I did disappointed to my family and myself until now i still feel sorry to them as i din appreciate the chance of been to UK. As times passes, time can lighten the pain and no matter how those have been be part of our memory where no one able to take it off from your memory. It becomes part of your life experience regardless how pain and suffer it is. Thus, thanks to those whoever that hurt you and love u before. Yet, it have been 6 months time from the day i reach Malaysia from UK. I have passed through decision making on many many issues during these 6 months. I did thought a lot and be the independent person. Everyone have to responsible on what they decide as it's your choices. JUST BE YOURSELF...Do love yourself before getting people to love you. Recently i had done a stupid thing as i been to a shopping mall and ended up i go back with a bad feeling after seeing someone. I just do not know the purpose i went there or may be i just to fulfill my last commitment to myself. And finally, i get it......

BRAND NEW ME

       Ding dong, here i come to post my first ever blog in my blog although i have set up this blogger account on November 2009...*oops, it is really quite long long time ago.* But, now i will share my life experience and my lovely and colorful life where i wish it will be exciting and interesting after having a quite a long time down period in my life. I did feel the care and love from my friends and support me all the time and yet i still stubborn and can't let go all the thing so easily. Yet, it needs time and time.Everything happened just a part of life and how did it meant to you is just the way how do you judge on it. It's all controlled by your mind and yet i know sometime action is just can't follow what the mind thinking and did a reverse action to defend our mind thinking. I admitted that i have a smooth life and it turns to be difficult to me when there's challenge coming to me. Finally, all are overcome when time passes. NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!!! Do Believe in Yourself. 

* it's just a small induction to my mystery world* 

Have a nice day everybody...Cheers.